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Navigating Chronic Health Issues as a Woman Leader
Darlene Hawley
How Women Leaders Can Thrive with Chronic Illness: Energy Management, Boundaries, and Sustainable Success
For years, I operated under the same belief most of us are taught... push through, keep going, don’t let them see you struggle. And I did. I showed up, did the work, hit deadlines, ran my business, supported my clients, and rarely canceled an appointment.
What people didn’t see was the cost: the exhaustion, the brain fog, the moments when my body was screaming for rest but I didn’t listen.
Eventually, my body forced me to.
That moment changed everything — not just for my health, but for how I lead, coach, and help others create sustainable success.
The Moment My Body Said “Enough”
I haven’t always been this open about my health. For years, I pushed through, ignoring the warning signs.
I thought slowing down meant weakness. That I had to prove I could keep up, no matter what.
Until my body forced me to listen.
I had just started a new position in retail management — excited, motivated, ready to prove myself. The long hours, the stress, the non-stop movement?
I told myself I could handle it.
Until one night, I couldn’t.
I was the closing manager, wrapping up a long shift, when my body failed me. A massive flare took over — pain searing through my joints, exhaustion hitting me all over.
The pain in my feet so bad that I physically couldn’t walk out of the store on my own.
So, my team — my employees — rolled me out of the store on a clothing cart.
I was mortified.
That’s how bad it was.
I somehow managed to drive home, using my left foot because my right side was too inflamed to push the pedal. When I finally made it home, I crawled into my house, completely drained — both physically and emotionally.
That moment changed everything.
I realized I had been fighting my body instead of working with it. I had ignored every sign it gave me, convinced that pushing through was the only way. That night, I realized my body would make me if I didn’t learn to listen.
Clients often find out — though sometimes years into working with me, that I live with a chronic health condition, an invisible autoimmune disease called Rheumatoid Arthritis (RA) and have for the past 25 years. They’re always surprised and say, “but you look so normal, I would have never known just by looking at you.”
What they don’t see is the behind-the-scenes energy management, the mindset work, and the systems I’ve built to make it all work. And I know I’m not alone. Many of my clients, colleagues, and fellow leaders are balancing high-impact work while managing chronic pain, fatigue, or unpredictable health conditions.
We keep going — not because we have to, but because we’ve found ways to make it work. And that’s the shift, instead of fighting against these challenges, what if we integrated them into the way we lead? What if our experience with chronic illness actually made us better leaders, coaches, and entrepreneurs?
Chronic Health Issues: The Unseen Challenge for Women Leaders
Chronic illness impacts women at higher rates than men. Autoimmune diseases, migraines, endometriosis, fibromyalgia, and hormonal disorders often go undiagnosed for years, and when they are acknowledged, we’re told to “push through.”
For those of us in leadership, this creates an invisible challenge, how do we maintain credibility, authority, and momentum while managing something that demands so much of us?
For me, the answer hasn’t been to hide my experience (though I didn’t always feel comfortable sharing it) — it’s been about learning how to turn it into a strength.
How My Health Journey Shapes My Coaching and Training
I don’t separate my chronic illness from my thought leadership — it’s part of my lived experience, and that profoundly influences how I coach and support others.
Over the years, I’ve gained invaluable lessons — ones I now teach my clients to help them navigate their own challenges.
1. Energy Awareness is the Foundation of Leadership
I used to operate like my energy was unlimited, like I could run on sheer willpower alone. (Spoiler alert, I couldn’t.) Now, I approach my work differently. I don’t force myself into a schedule that doesn’t fit my natural energy rhythms — I build my business around them. I teach my clients to do the same, whether they have a chronic condition or not. Because when you know how to work with your energy instead of against it, everything flows more easily.
2. Boundaries Aren’t Selfish — They’re Survival
I used to say yes to everything. Every opportunity. Every request. Every last-minute favor. Until I couldn’t anymore. Chronic illness made me get brutally honest about what I can and can’t take on, and that’s been one of the biggest gifts. Now, I help my clients set the kinds of boundaries that protect their time, energy, and well-being — without guilt, without apology. Because saying no to what drains you is really saying yes to yourself.
3. Systems Are the Secret to Doing More with Less Effort
Brain fog and decision fatigue are real. Some days, my brain feels like a browser with 47 tabs open and half of them frozen. That’s why I rely on systems — not just for efficiency, but for survival. I help my clients create workflows that simplify their decision-making, eliminate unnecessary stress, and free up mental space for the work that actually moves the needle. Because the less energy you waste on “What should I do next?” the more you have for what truly matters.
4. Rest is a Leadership Strategy, Not a Luxury
I used to see rest as something I had to earn. Now, I see it as something that makes me better at what I do. I don’t wait until I’m running on empty to take a break — I build rest into my routine. Microbreaks, white space on my calendar, and even full days off when my body needs it. I teach my clients to do the same because when you’re well-rested, you’re more creative, more present, and — let’s be real — a lot less resentful of your work.
5. True Resilience is Built on Self-Trust, Not Just Grit
People love to glorify resilience as if it’s just about pushing through. But the strongest leaders I know? They don’t just push through — they pause, they listen, they adjust. They trust themselves enough to know when it’s time to shift gears. That’s what I help my clients develop, not just the ability to keep going, but the wisdom to know when to slow down, ask for help, or pivot. Because resilience isn’t about proving how much you can endure — it’s about building a life and business that supports you, not drains you.
Thriving, Not Just Surviving
Living with a chronic condition while running a business or leading a team isn’t easy — but it has given me insights and strengths I wouldn’t have developed otherwise. It has made me a better leader. A better coach. A better advocate for the women I work with.
I bring this experience into my coaching because I know what it’s like to navigate leadership while also managing health challenges. I know how to create strategies that actually work in real life — not just in theory.
For those of you juggling work, family, leadership, and health — know you’re not alone. And you don’t have to do it the hard way. There’s a way to thrive, build impact, and show up fully without burning out. I know, because I’ve built it for myself — and I help others do the same.
If this resonates, I’d love to hear from you.
How have you balanced leadership while managing a chronic condition? Let’s talk about it — because the more we share, the more we can support each other in building businesses and careers that work for us, not against us.
*This article was originally posted on Medium.
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Hey There!
I'm Darlene
As a mother, wife, connector, and dream builder, I’m Darlene Hawley, the founder of DarleneHawley.com and an Executive Leadership & Businesss Coach dedicated to empowering leaders like you.
My passion lies in helping ambitious professionals cultivate their unique leadership style while crafting an authentic and impactful personal brand. Through my coaching, we’ll work together to build a solid foundation that not only inspires your team but also drives results and growth within your organization.
Since 2007, I have been committed to guiding leaders and entrepreneurs in launching and scaling their businesses with confidence and clarity.
Today, I focus on supporting women in reaching their leadership goals and living their dream lives—all while balancing the joys of raising my family and creating meaningful memories each day.
Together, we’ll transform your challenges into opportunities, allowing you to lead with authenticity and inspire those around you.
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