Who It’s For: Entrepreneurs, Senior Business Leaders, Managers, Sales Professionals, Female Leaders, and R&D, Innovation, DEI, and Other Critical Teams
How to Speak with Confidence: A Vocal Empowerment System for Business Owners and Leaders
Darlene Hawley
A practical, trauma-sensitive guide to overcome fear, clarify your message, and communicate with impact to grow your business or lead your team.
Have you ever left a meeting, a conversation, or even a networking event thinking, "Ugh… Why didn’t I say what I really wanted to say?"
If so, you’re not alone.
Whether you're an entrepreneur trying to grow your business, a team leader managing others, or a professional stepping into more visibility, learning to speak up isn’t just a “nice to have"... it’s necessary to move to the next level.
As a business, communication and leadership coach, I’ve worked with hundreds of leaders who have powerful ideas, amazing services, and perfect solutions, yet who struggle to use their voice when it matters most.
That’s why I teach the Step into Your Moxie® Vocal Empowerment System… a trauma-sensitive, self-empowerment framework rooted in psychological safety, confidence-building, and purpose-driven messaging.
Let’s walk through the five core components of this system and explore how they support entrepreneurs and leaders to communicate with impact.
1. Taming the Inner Critic
The first voice you have to speak over... is your own.
We all carry an internal voice that whispers, "Who am I to walk into this room,” You’re not ready," or "Don’t mess this huge opportunity up." This inner critic thrives in moments where we’re stretching, risking, or showing up in new ways.
I once worked with a woman preparing to pitch her business at a major event. Her content was strong, her presence magnetic… but her inner voice kept telling her she didn’t belong in the room. She didn't feel like she had earned a seat at the table.
Through our coaching together, she learned to recognize and reframe that narrative. She didn’t need to shut down the voice… she needed to understand it, soothe it, and speak from her empowered self instead.
Action Tip:
Next time your inner critic starts to take over, pause and write down exactly what it’s saying.
Look at the words on the page and ask yourself:
Is this 100% true?
Whose voice is this really?
What’s one thing I know to be true about my strengths or experience?
Naming the inner critic’s script helps you separate fear from fact so you can shift back into your power and speak from your true voice.. not the one rooted in self-doubt.
2. Understanding Physiological Sensation
Speaking up isn’t just a mindset game… it’s a full body experience.
When we prepare to speak, especially in high-stakes moments, our body often responds before our words do. We may feel tightness in our chest, a lump in our throat, sweaty palms, bright red cheeks, or shaky legs. These sensations are natural responses to vulnerability and visibility.
Learning to recognize and work with these sensations, rather than fight them, is a big part of owning and using your voice. By developing practices that ground the body and calm the nervous system, we can access our voice with more ease and presence.
Action Tip:
Try this before your next big conversation or presentation:
Take three deep, slow belly breaths. Breathe in through your nose for a count of four, hold for four, and exhale through your mouth for six.
Repeat this a few times, feeling your body settle. This simple breathing technique calms your nervous system, grounds your energy, and helps you access your voice with more ease and confidence.
3. Clarifying Your Message
You can be confident, but if your message isn’t clear, people won’t take action.
Messaging is more than words… it’s about alignment. Your voice, your story, your tone, and your delivery all need to communicate what you stand for. That means simplifying what you offer, naming the transformation, and connecting emotionally with your audience.
I often work with clients who “circle and talk around" what they do… using vague or overly complex language, even jargon words that only people i their industry would understand. Once we clarify their message, everything clicks. Confidence goes up, leads come in, and conversations move forward into clients.
Action Tip:
Grab a sticky note and answer this question in one sentence:
"What do I want my audience to understand, believe, or do after hearing me speak?"
Keep your answer short and clear enough that someone outside your industry could understand it.
If you can't explain it simply, your audience won't remember it. Practice saying it out loud until it feels natural. This will become your go-to short introduction hook anytime you speak about your business or leadership message.
4. Embodied Presence
Your presence speaks before you do.
This is about how you carry yourself. How you walk into a room. How you show up on Zoom. How your voice lands when you speak your truth.
Your authentic presence is built through awareness, breath, posture, and practice. It’s not about being "perfect"... it’s about being rooted, present, and unapologetically yourself. This is where role-play, experiential learning, and improv exercises come in… because presence is felt by others and is you showing up as your true, unapologetic self.
Action Tip:
Before your next meeting, presentation, or sales conversation, try this grounding exercise:
Stand tall with both feet planted firmly on the ground.
Take a slow breath in and roll your shoulders back and down.
Imagine growing roots and rooting yourself to the floor.
As you speak, focus on feeling the support of the ground beneath you and the strength of your posture.
This small shift in how you carry yourself can change how people experience you in person and on camera.
5. Moving People to Action
Great communication doesn’t just sound good. It creates change.
Whether you're selling a service, pitching an idea, or leading a team meeting, your words can move people. But only if you're intentional about what action you want them to take.
Ask yourself: What do I want them to think, feel, and do after I speak?
When your message is anchored in clarity, presence, and purpose, it becomes a tool for impact. You’re not just talking. You’re leading.
Action Tip:
Before you speak, take 30 seconds to visualize the outcome you want to create.
Ask yourself: What do I want people to think, feel, or do after they hear me?
What is the ONE action I hope they take?
Speak with that outcome in mind. End with a clear, direct invitation. Whether it’s to book a call, try a new approach, share their thoughts, or take the next step with you.
Your words have power when they lead people somewhere meaningful.
A Trauma-Sensitive, Justice-Oriented Approach
Everything I teach is grounded in psychological safety, trauma awareness, and the belief that your voice is power, especially for women, BIPOC leaders, LGBTQIA+ professionals, and other historically silenced communities.
We don’t need to “fix” our voices.
We need to own them.
We need to practice in safe spaces.
We need to rewrite the story that our voice isn’t welcome.
That’s why in every coaching session or workshop I lead, we create space for play, reflection, feedback, and growth. We practice speaking not just to sound good yet to feel empowered.
If you’re a business owner, executive, or rising leader who wants to grow your visibility and impact… start with your voice.
Because when you use your voice with clarity and confidence... people listen.
They follow.
They buy.
They believe.
And the ripple effect of that is a life changing.
Ready to Bring Vocal Empowerment to Your Business or Team?
Whether you’re looking to strengthen your own voice or empower your team to communicate with more confidence and clarity, I’d love to support you.
Let’s talk about how the Step into Your Moxie® Vocal Empowerment System can help you overcome fear, speak with impact, and move people to action—whether you're leading a team meeting, presenting to clients, or growing your business.
Send me a message, book a free strategy call, or visit darlenehawely.com/workwithme
to learn more.
Your voice matters. Let’s make sure people hear it.
✨Ready to Own Your Story and Attract Your Dream Clients?✨
If you’re ready to stop second-guessing your message and start using storytelling as a powerful tool to connect, inspire, and sell—then I’d love to invite you to my It’s Time to Own Your Story: Mini-Course.
In this self-paced course, you’ll learn how to:
✔️ Identify the key moments in your story that captivate your audience.
✔️ Share your story in a way that builds trust and positions you as the go-to expert.
✔️ Use storytelling across your website, social media, and sales conversations to attract and convert more clients.
Plus, you’ll get a
step-by-step workbook and
personal feedback on your brand story—so you can start sharing with confidence.
Hey There!
I'm Darlene
As a mother, wife, connector, and dream builder, I’m Darlene Hawley, the founder of DarleneHawley.com and an Executive Leadership & Businesss Coach dedicated to empowering leaders like you.
My passion lies in helping ambitious professionals cultivate their unique leadership style while crafting an authentic and impactful personal brand. Through my coaching, we’ll work together to build a solid foundation that not only inspires your team but also drives results and growth within your organization.
Since 2007, I have been committed to guiding leaders and entrepreneurs in launching and scaling their businesses with confidence and clarity.
Today, I focus on supporting women in reaching their leadership goals and living their dream lives—all while balancing the joys of raising my family and creating meaningful memories each day.
Together, we’ll transform your challenges into opportunities, allowing you to lead with authenticity and inspire those around you.
Confidence isn’t automatic at the executive level. Here’s how to reclaim it.
Want your company to cover the cost of executive coaching? Learn how to make the business case, advocate for your growth, and use a sample email script.
How Embracing Vulnerability and Living Boldly Transforms Lives
How being seen in your full humanity transforms your leadership, your visibility—and your business
Celebrating 19 years in business! Discover 19 hard-earned lessons on leadership, visibility, and growth—plus a special $190 coaching offer.
Small rituals lead to big visibility. Learn how leaders and entrepreneurs can use intentional practices to create connection, clarity, and confidence.
I was facilitating a one-day Speak Up & Influence team-building experiential training when I noticed her sitting quietly in the back of the room. She participated, but never fully spoke her mind, staying just under the radar, what I like to call "playing it safe". After one of the vocal empowerment activities, I walked over and said, “You know, the way you just helped your group reframe that challenge? That’s leadership. And I don’t think anyone’s told you lately... but you have a really powerful presence when you speak.” She blinked, stunned. Then smiled...a BIG cheesy grin. “Wow. I… don’t think anyone’s ever said that to me,” she said. “I thought I was just rambling.” That moment changed her energy and how she showed up the rest of the day. She spoke up more. She leaned in. She took more space. By the end of the day, she was laughing with her colleagues and, dare I say, being Bold and having FUN. That’s the power of being seen. Not liked. Not evaluated. Not coached. Witnessed. Witnessing Is Deeper Than Praise Recognition isn’t just about saying “good job.” It’s about creating space for people to feel seen in the room. And as an executive leadership coach, trainer, and speaker, I believe this is one of the most powerful tools we have. It’s part of why I teach the Step into Your Moxie® Vocal Empowerment Framework to help people speak with confidence and presence, And to help them feel safe enough to show up as unapologetically as themselves. The framework includes: Naming the Inner Critic Creating Psychological Safety Clarifying the Message Owning Presence Moving People to Take Action But none of that sticks if we don’t feel witnessed. The Real Role of Recognition in Leadership Recognition is not limited to annual performance reviews. It’s being in the moment with someone. It’s telling the truth of what you see... and helping them see it too. When we recognize someone for who they are, not just what they do, it creates: Trust Confidence Belonging Momentum It tells them, “You matter. Right now. Just as you are.” And for many people, that’s enough to shift everything. How Vocal Empowerment Starts with Being Seen I’ve worked with countless leaders who don’t need help with strategy... they need to be reminded they have a voice worth sharing. Their ideas aren’t the problem. Their presence is stifled by years of not being heard. And when someone finally says, “I see you. I hear you. I believe you have something valuable to say,”... they rise to the occasion. That’s what witnessing does. That’s what coaching is. And that’s what powerful leadership should include. My Truth About Leadership + Visibility I believe every single person deserves to be put in a position where they are the leader. But leadership is not one-size-fits-all. It’s not about being the loudest or most polished. It’s about being thoughtful about the right kind of visibility... and showing up unapologetically as yourself. We need more leaders who understand this. Who witness others without fixing them. Who show people what’s possible by being real, not rehearsed. How does it feel when someone truly witnesses you... not just your performance, but your presence? And who in your world could use that kind of recognition right now? Say it. Share it. Watch them light up. Try This: A Visibility Icebreaker That Builds Trust Here’s a simple, powerful exercise I love using to open workshops, team meetings, or small groups: Two Truths and a Lie: Leadership Edition Each person shares: Two true things about how they lead, speak, or show up One “lie” they used to believe about themselves Example: ✔ I’m a clear communicator ✔ I make people feel safe when I lead ✖ I’m not good at public speaking (← the old lie) This twist brings visibility and vulnerability together... without putting anyone on the spot. It allows people to own their growth and shift their inner critic by speaking it out loud. Try it. Let me know how it goes with your next team meeting. Coming Next in Part 4: Crafting Connection: Simple Rituals to Help You and Your Team Feel Seen Because being witnessed isn’t a one-time act. It’s a culture. It’s a practice. And it starts with you.
We’ve never been more connected... and never felt so unseen. With a few taps, we can join a Zoom room, drop into a DM, or post something vulnerable for hundreds of people to witness. But there's a disconnect. And in a tech-driven world where everything moves fast and engagement is measured in emoji reactions… are we truly connecting... or just being consumed? “To be recognised, you have to be seen, you have to be heard – and that requires a witnessing that can’t happen in two-second increments.” —— Allison J Pugh in her article The Unseen in Aeon Magazine You can post every day and still feel invisible. You can be in a dozen Slack channels and still feel isolated. You can have 10k followers and feel like no one is really paying attention. Because we’ve built a world where connection is constant... but deep roots are rare. The Pace of Tech vs. the Slowness of Being Seen We scroll fast. We skim emails. We record meetings and never rewatch them. But being seen takes time. It requires presence. Stillness. The very things today’s digital culture works against. And when you’re constantly “on”, but rarely witnessed... it’s easy to feel like you’re disappearing in plain sight. This is especially true for entrepreneurs and leaders. We’re told to post, share, create, show up, stay visible… and yet, we’re rewarded for comments, not true connection. That’s the tension we’re living in... and the one we need to name. Why I Don’t Create for Social (and What I Do Instead) Let’s get honest, social media isn’t the main event... it’s the after-party. The first time someone finds me isn’t on LinkedIn. It’s at a speaking event, on a podcast, or through a referral. Then they follow me on social. Then they join my newsletter. Social media isn’t where I get discovered. It’s where I nurture relationships that already exist. That’s why I don’t create for the algorithm... I write for my community. I share my heart through emails and long-form blog or video content. Then I repurpose it on social... not to “go viral,” but to stay connected. And here’s the magic part: Some of my clients? They’ve been on my list for 6+ years. Never replied to a post. Never commented. And one day... they book a call. Because they’ve been listening the whole time. They were waiting for the right moment.... not the right reel. When Tech Makes You Feel Small But even with that perspective, I still feel it. That sting when you pour your heart into a post and it gets 3 likes. That feeling after a Zoom room full of “great people!”… but the coffee chat that follows doesn't convert to referrals or business. That’s what the fast pace of our digital world does. It makes us visible... but not witnessed. It makes us accessible... but nothing deeper becomes of it. You can have the right lighting, captions, camera angle... and still feel like no one’s really seeing the person behind the post. The Shift: From Performance to Presence The solution isn’t more hustle or noise. It’s more presence. So, if you're feeling invisible right now, even while showing up “everywhere,” hit pause and take a breath. Ask yourself: Am I sharing because I have to, or from a place of inspiration? Am I connecting, or just posting to stay in the feed? Who am I hoping will really see me? Then, choose one way to show up differently this week. Call someone instead of commenting. Write the post that feels inspiring, not strategic. Or close the laptop and go be with real people, even when it feels uncomfortable. Because yes, people are watching... even if they’re silent. But more importantly, you deserve to feel connected, even when tech feels like it's sucking your soul.
Loneliness isn’t the problem—it’s invisibility. Discover why being truly seen matters and how to reclaim your voice in a noisy, disconnected world.
